Lately I have been very moody and unhappy for certain things , especially last week where I had a lot of breakdowns and disappointment; some with tears and some without. I started to hate myself again for being such a baby and get offended so easily. This is where all of my negativity had taken control of me AGAIN, but , thank God there's "he", who understands, who comforts and calms me down (although he's still away from the city and all I could receive were texts and phone calls). I'm really sorry that I've complained so much and being not thankful for what I have. Then I felt the positivity has bring me to the side of being happy and free from self-insulting and low self-esteem.
Then I had a very extremely great whole day with him yesterday, since he's back from his vacation. And I'm really very thankful for all of his superb and wonderful gifts. I could tell that he has put a lot of considerations and concerns of what to give me, as to why I reckoned: He bought me films when he knew I'm in need of them, then he bought me rose bouquet which I'm currently fond of , and he also gave me a very beautiful dress and I'm not sure why, but I'm just guessing that he just wanted me to have more confidence as a woman and to prevent me from saying myself ugly over and over again like I used to. He has been a such wonderful gentleman and I feel so fortunate to have him as my appleheart. It's just less than 10 days before I'll go back to Singapore to continue college and that's when distance will part us for nearly a year but I hope that he'll be able to visit me there before he went back to his country where he's studying. But if not, then for the future I just hope that distance won't ruin our trust and our endearment to one another and stay faithful and committed to each other. Missing him certainly will be daily for me and it probably will be lonelier, but I'm sure it will worth the patience and the wait.
Hope nothing will be in vain for both of us.
TLC <3
