Feeling Lowered...

Lately, I've been really emotional with everything that I see these days, hanging out with friends, watching fighting and happy couples, and judging strangers. I realized there are so many "social steps" that I have to walk and run. I used to have positive thinking about all this and I always question, "Why am I single? Why am I single? Do I look really super ugly?? THAT BAD?? " and I always answer "It's not because you're too ugly to have a relationship, it's not because of outer beauty, it's because you're looking for a right partner who really understands you and isn't afraid of having commitment with you (seriously). and also because patience always rewards". Yeah.. I used to have that kind of thinking ,but now I don't think I could think that way anymore. I realized that physical looks are always the main factor and will always be the main factor in having relationship. Whenever a guy or a man said that one of the reasons why he dates a girl is because of that girl's inner beauty, FOR THE GIRLS WHO READ, you should know, THAT IS BULLSHIT. There's no man or guy who fall for you without looking at your face or your body. Believe me, it's how they take your "wind" away and then when they get bored with you, they'll just throw away your "wind" like a useless meaningless trash. It's not just merely about being subjective, IT'S THE TRUTH. From now on, I feel so hard to  trust anyone (especially guys), Change your mind about me? Fine then,  besides I'm just confessing and I think I did the right thing. No regrets :)

Taking Break

Today was a bit loose than the yesterdays and it's time to unwind and relax. I doubt that I'll be able to have some breaks starting from next week because next week will be a very scary week for foundation students :(

Adapting

Oh my God, it has only been 3 days college and I'm going crazy because of my timetable, learning portal, and the art materials that I have yet to search and buy! I can't believe I would spend so much for materials only, the tutors sure speak like well-off people -.-". I never thought I will be this tired and exhausted but hopefully I'll manage to get used to it :)

Freedom and Boundary

 

 Been attending college for  3 days, and I made some good friendly friends. I felt so free at large however I also felt so busy with the college activities. No kidding about what my seniors told me yesterday, now I know what it feels like to be a college student. I even doubt I can keep on updating my blog. WILL BE SUPER BUSY SOON :(

New Beginning

So tomorrow is my first time attending class in college, feel excited and excitable. I'm gonna face numerous of hard competitors and different style-teaching teachers. Knowing that the assignments and homework for my foundation studies will be mountains of burdens from some of my seniors, I feel so uneasy and anxious now. But let's just wait and see whether it's true or not. :|

RELIEF RELEASE

Been in Singapore for almost a week now and feel so relieved after obtaining my student pass and student card. Thank God I've finally settled all the documents problem and college registration and now I feel so free and happy. I can't wait to start my college studies and start to change my old shabby self to a new greater self. :)

Homesicking

It has been 4 days living in Singapore, and I am still worried about my documents which will be used in making the student pass here. Thanks to my agent and his crews for screwing my data and now I'm GD anxious. But despite all that, I miss dad, friends (although some of them can't show up yesterday) and home now .I really miss playing piano too although I can't wait to start my college life here. It's just happy and sad at the same time. I just pray and keep on praying that everything will go well and I hope I'll be home by December or sooner to get this homesick over. Miss y'all so much guys <3